Aveline's Fear
by OhItsAmy
Summary: Lets take a look at Aveline's thoughts on our favourite misfits...


If there was one flaw she had, it was fear. Not fear of battle. Neither was it fear of dying. But a full, unbridled fear that very soon some of her friends would be dead. Especially Hawke.

Aveline wasn't one to voice her concerns, but the situation was becoming ridiculous. Hawke was always running off to save someone in distress, be it a rogue mage or a kitten trapped in a tree. An ancient tree surrounded by ghouls and skeletons.

Now that was a strange day. And despite the trauma the cat had been through it still managed to maul Hawke's hand eliciting a high pitched screech of surprise from the warrior. This was rather unfortunate and word of the feminine yelp spread around the town like wildfire. Hawke tried his best to stop it and needless to say Varric was telling anyone who would listen. Now everyone in Kirkwall had heard tales of the highest and most lady-like voice in the land. of course Hawke's... girlfriend? Lady companion? Merrill's rival? well she was no help for Hawke during that time, attempting to recreate the moment by sneaking up on him to make him jump.

That whore.

Always picking fights in bars and causing trouble for everyone in general really. Unfortunately as time wore on the 'Big Girl' had gotten soft. Even going so far as to think of Isabela as a friend. Though that was something neither were prepared to admit out loud in public or anywhere on the planet.

And Merrill. Where would she begin with that naive Dalish elf? That girl was one spell away from becoming an abomination. Not to mention the time she had to bail Merrill out of jail after she'd taken the 'Alienage Greeting' a bit too far. She cast a spell that froze the entire alienage so she could 'be friends with all of the residents' and pick pocket everyone. Trying to explain away the magically frozen elves to the Templars was quite the feat. One Aveline would not like to test again.

The dwarf was another matter entirely. After heading into the deep roads Aveline was further convinced that there as more to Varric than met the eye. She'd once asked him what he did for a living and received a fairly ambiguous answer in return. The dwarf weaved tales so flawlessly it was near impossible to separate fact from exaggeration. This was especially true in the case of Hawke, who was so unpredictable and heroic any part of the story was plausible. Obviously the story about him towering 9ft tall and sporting a large beard filled with his enemy's blood wasn't true. Despite his prowess to kill dragons, Hawke couldn't grow a beard. Sure there was some stubble, but in all the years that she'd known him he'd never grow more than a moustache, which was very quickly ridiculed into obscurity. Hawke was so embarrassed that everyone who saw it was sworn into secrecy, and vowed never to mention it again. Of course that didn't stop Aveline thinking about how silly it looked. A hormonal teenage boy could have grown a better moustache.

Ah, Fenris. The dark, or silver, horse of the group. Every one of them had a secret but Fenris was something else. His past as a slave was of course interesting, but the only person he talked to about it was Hawke. And despite being badgered (and other things) by Isaleba, he wouldn't crack the full story. Hawke took loyalty to a new level.

Selfish man.

None the less the guessing had begun. Varric thought Fenris had defied his Slaver, killing all in his path only to reach Hawke in Kirkwall and fall in love. Isabela particularly liked this version, but maker knows why. Aveline guessed that she wasn't the jealous type, yet. Anders wouldn't shut up about his manifesto, therefore was kicked out of the conversation and Merrill was more than happy to listen, blushing every time Varric mentioned Hawkes name. Fenris' obvious hatred of mages was at odds with the fact that lyrium was burned into his skin, therefore allowing him to channel magical energy. In some ways he was a hybrid of mage and elf. As if she'd tell him that. He'd probably die right on the spot and Anders would have a field day.

Anders. The preacher of the group. Whilst no one had anything against the mage debating about the fight against the Templars, it would help if he was debating against someone other than himself. He could spend hours talking about the mages plight for freedom but never realised everyone was getting fed up. In a dark corner of Aveline's mind she thought about telling the Templars about him, just to shut him up. But he was Aveline's friend, not to mention a damn good healer. She would never sell out her friends, no matter how irritating and twatish he was.

Her mind wandered to the mage prison, where Hawkes sister Bethany now lived. Trapped in secrecy and hiding her magic she was eventually caught healing an injured boy who'd fallen down some steps. Aveline felt a strong urge to find the whistleblower and have them arrested, but of course justice is served in different ways and she couldn't just go around arresting people whom she disliked. Bethany was, is, a kind girl. Every time Aveline visited she always had a smile on her face, hiding the fear and sadness behind a shield of strength. It was in those moments that Aveline saw the likeness in the Hawke family. Bethany was strugging through, making the best of her situation whilst her brother fought for justice for the people of Kirkwall. Hawke's mother still blamed him for the death of his brother Carver despite it being obvious that it was the ogre who did the damage.

Everyone deals with grief in different ways.

Grief was a funny thing, Aveline couldn't remember the last time she'd cried over her lost husband. It wasn't like she'd forgotten about Wesley she was just, busy. Perhaps that was the road to recovery, moving on with life and accepting what happened. Part of her hated Hawke for making her kill the love of her life. But, he didn't force her hand. Often in the past anger clouded her mind, making her believe that Hawke had forced her hand. He'd offered her the choice really, either he would end Wesley's life or she would. Neither was acceptable to Aveline, but seeing him in that much pain….

Pulling herself together, Aveline remembered where she was. It was understandable to lose herself in thought at work. Sometimes the guards would leave her alone for hours on end to read through and sign important documents. Reading the one on top Aveline realised what started this long train of thought. The Viscount had sent down an order to ask Hawke to face the Arishok. It was hoped he would be able to discover why the Qunari were still here and get them to leave. This wasn't going to be easy and Aveline was dreading telling Hawke. Mr Hero would want to help in any sarcastic way possible.

Hoping against hope that nothing bad would happen, Aveline sent a letter to the Hawke mansion requesting his presence with the Viscount.

This was going to get messy.


End file.
